haha..

I guess all my worries were just due to me being overly paranoid. Edmund's attached now and seems to be enjoying life well enough.. Lolx.. Guess it really time to let go of all those fears that i've been holding on to and start to really enjoy life.

Let bygones be bygones, just wanna start all things new.

Sure as winter goes and comes around again
I will be my own undoing in the end
I'll find the answers I've been searching for
In your goodbye kiss
'Cause I don't deserve you and you don't deserve this

o's starting tml.

Was about to sleep when i decided to blog just to mark this day.

Happy Birthday Lyon

Bro you're finally 16. Haha. Wait for me leh. 3 more months. =P

Mmm.. Third time i'm greeting you happy birthday le nah.. Lolx. Eh.. I stayed up specially tonight just to call you de nah.. You should be honoured. Haha.

Anyway, for some people, 'O' are gonna start tomorrow. Worried ? Stressed ? Quote from our dear lyon "Have faith. Pray."

Good luck people. Miss you all.

Think i'm the only one telling you this, but still..

Lyon you had better study hard !!

-

Well look at me, the guy who's got it all
Tryin' to read my own writing on the wall
Not happy 'til the sadness comes
To keep me company
Oh, but what becomes of fools who love like me

Who's gonna dry my tears
When I'm crying?
Who's gonna hold my hand
When I'm dying?
Who's gonna set me right when
Everything is wrong
Who's gonna love me
When you're gone?

graduation - this is the end

Bleah~

My school is weird. They're having their physics prac tomorrow yet the graduation ceremony was tonight.. Lolx.. Mmm.. The decor end up was really badly done.. Ms yeo didnt allow some stuff in the end.. So had quite some last minute changes.. Haix.. Anyway.. In all, the day was fun. Lolx..

Too bad the atmosphere wasnt that good. Still remember Camp Teen last year.. Lolx.. The people there were damn fun. Really daring, especially after the campfire, during the dance. Lolx. It's my life.

Oh, the dance was well.. Ookay.. When she started *shakin'* you could really hear some laughter from the backstage.. Lolx.. I guess i would too if i was there.. =/

The funniest thing that happened was that well, some people for some reason had to stare for a moment before realising who i am. Lolx. Weird. Was just wearing a casual top and a pair of cargos, so really felt i looked damn normal as compared to the seniors that really dressed up for the event.. Lolx.. But, maybe it was coz of my bandana. Haha. =/

On a sidenote, some not so pleasant stuff. As reminded. Today's his birthday. Wanted to light 15 tealight candles just now at school with them. But decided not to. Rather, just gonna light one and place it outside my place later. Happy Birthday YC.

grad

Av crew's not gonna play the song. Carol wants me to go i.n.s.t.r.u.c.t. them on how i want my atmosphere done up. Wth.

Anyway, still have some stuff not bought. Think i'll go buy it on Monday first before going to school. Get dear Pi-celia to make the Sec 2s do the inflating of my 200 balloons. Hehe.. Judging from the number that turned up to help yesterday, well, we can say they're in for a hard time.

Oh well. Just nice, gives me enough time to buy the candles and stuff.. The performers had better not get in my way.. Still got to secure the banner again. Very scared the wings'll fall. Soaring to greater heights. Lolx. Falling from greater heights.

Heard from one of the guys who's gonna be up there in the control room on Monday night that they're not playing that song~ Lolx.. Was convincing carol to use it.. Have to rememebr to burn and bring the cd on monday. It's really the most suitable one. Both for them and for me.

Known them for bout 2+ years. Forged rather close bonds with some. Even though you say you'll be back. Even though you said you've never left. Life's different now. Things'll change somehow. Dont say it wont. I saw how it does. Jian Yong. You should know what i mean, dont you ? Maybe things'll get better. Maybe things wont get so bad. Yet, I quite sure, everything will change.

I'll miss you all. Love ya. =)

As we go on
We remember
All the times we
Had together
And as our lives change
Come Whatever
We will still be
Friends Forever

grad

Finally. The banners're up. All three of them. Everything's almost done up.. Just some touching up to do.. Carol seemed to like it alot.. The entire decoration setup.. Well.. It's nice.. But it's really really really not normal for her to keep on praising me bout it. Lolx.

Actually dont really see much. Seemed really plain to me.. Just hope the balloon'll give the finishing touch.. Really cant trust carol's taste. She seem to prefer plain stuff. Kept on commenting on how much it reminds her of a wedding. Especially the drapes at the back..


Mr cho was saying this to me yesterday, "Why bother to put in so much effort for it, it's not as if they'll notice"

Maybe. But if they do, really want them to enjoy it as much as i enjoyed doing everything. Oh well.. Besides, dont wanna disappoint connie and izzulwan. =P

So you guys better open your eyes wide and appreciate the hardwork 'cause i did up almost everything by myself, staying back even later than the performers just so as to meet the deadline for YOU. =(

Love you guys though. Good luck, I'll miss ya. =)

icecold

Been doing the banner for the graduation ceremony for the last few days. Was supposed to be performing for both too. But.. Well.. I dropped out of one dance and was then kicked out of the other. Lolx.

Actually not kicked out.. Just that Quan Qi got the wrong messge from Edwin, thinking edwin told him to stop teaching and so.. Blah blah.. So when edwin and co arrived 'win was trying to get me to dance. But well, didnt feel like it. So might as well not. Only think was that felt it was somewhat a pity. Wasted almost TWO months learning it and when i was FINALLY able to remember the steps for it. Wasted. Suan le. Not interested in humiliating myself infront of all my friends and seniors.

So my banner's almost done. But the font!!! What font!! I want a nice nice nice nice nice nice nice one for my main banner. Now have almost all the stuff done except for the wordings. I'll do it after i decide the font. But just a slight problem. What font ? Haha. Banner's goin up on Friday after school. Hope the wings dont fall off. Wish me luck. =P

apple

Apples are nice.

Anyway.. Heard i passed my a math. Hehe. 40/80 most likely. =/

Someone mentioned ms liow today. Confused over her sexual identity she takes it out on us students. Brr.. Dont keep remind me of the fact she still holds my number. I'm still freaked out. Ah well. 2e1.

Yee Chiat. Wonder how would he've turned out if it never happened. Creepy as it sounds i can still hear his laughter echoing in my mind.

Still remember that day was during math period. Joshua was still commenting on how loud he laughs. Haha.

Then came the holidays. The break. Then he was gone. Didnt believe it at first. Regrets. Thought they were joking about it. Then reality finally dawned on me when he came in. It's been about 18 months. Thanks for being such a great friend.


Love leaves a memory no one can steal.
Death leaves a heartache no one can heal.

apple

Okay.. Had a math and ss today.. Lets say.. Was quite fun. Serious. Though i know i'll end up failing both.

Social Studies.

Finished question 1a, then didnt really knew how to do 1b, skipped after writing a few lines. 1c was the one that killed me. I wrote almost a whole page for that freaking question. So what's the problem ? The question was "Is Source C & D reliable ?" type not the "Study Source C & D" type. I realised that as the second hour was closing in. Ouch. So decided to skip the last question first before returning later. Huge mistake as i later realise that the question was quite easy + i didnt have the time. -.-

Oh well.

Shall not elaborate on my structured as it was just as bad. Sad tale.

A math. Weirdly, i felt that this time it was quite okay. With this coming from me. You can start expecting a few full marks. My prediction for myself is 35/80 though. Ah well. Today was fun. >.<

Apple.

just wanna say this to all

Just wanna say this to all those people who were with me all this time.

Especially John and Eugene. Even though you both had some problems too, you guys stood by me all this while.

Not forgetting you. Andrew. You showed me the way out.

Thank you. Love you all.

nuts

First time i'm feeling stressed. First time i'm losing so many screws due to it. Seems to be going nuts already. Mood swings getting worst. Feeling more depressed than i did 3 months back. Seem to be losing control over myself. Cant take it.

Need that peace of mind.

Need to study even harder.

Dont wanna lose my place.

So scared.

Wanna get out from this darkness.

Help.

biology

I can't believe i was so bloody forgetful. Forgetting to bring my calculator for e math paper 2. Crap. Realised last minute as the paper was starting that i didn't bring my calculator so didnt even had to time to get my spare one back from jason.. Sheesh. Oh well.

Rosalind loaned me her spare. Was nice of her. But it's like so totally crazy with that missing digit. Spent so much time trying to figure out the number there that didnt even have time to finish my paper. Left 28 marks blank. Empty. Giving myself an additional 10 marks allowance.. Mmm.. 42/80 .. Oh well. There goes my A ..

History was fun. Not.

Chinese Communist Party. Chinese. China. China's history. Haix. Cant believe she gave China. Actually i can believe that. Expected it. Oh well. That's not the point. Anyway, China in general in just NOT my cuppa tea. I find that Mao guy gross. Pervert. I find the numerous concubines idea crazy. I find that China's past leaders are creepy. >.<

Anyway. I forgot how to answer the questions for SBQ. Only remembered when mrs ong asked us to stop. Could've rammed myself into the wall then. Was right beside me anyway. Next. Structured essay. Didnt fare any better.

Russia. Stalin's Rule. The only part on Russia i wasnt good in. Ouch. Next.

China. KMT vs CCP. Dont like China history in general. Know enough to pass with quite a good mark but there's no fun factor in it. Next.

Germany. Fall of Weimar.

Okay.. I did read up on Germany. Somewhat. More on how the Nazis took over. So when the first part asked for the Treaty of Versailles. Oh well. Just had to try my luck.


Biology paper 2 tomorrow. Dunno what i dunno yet. Was doing that May/June 2004 paper just now. Not much sec 3 stuff in this year's Paper 2 actually.. Oh well. I want my A1 !! >.<

lullaby

Had both paper 1 for english and chinese yesterday. Was fun. Yea. I'm serious. Lolx.. Therefore I conclude I'll fail them both. =/ Out of point la.. Lolx. Heck. It always happens. Anyway.. Because my school is weird and weird school I have. My next paper'll be on this Thursday.. Oh well.. As if it'll make a difference to me.. Don't even bother studying.. Not that I dont want.. Just that really've no mood nah.. >.<

Fele like going to church before my papers.. No idea why.. Asked lyon.. Was actually okay except for the fact that the service ends way after my curfew. Ah well.

I miss andrew. I miss my lullaby. Lolx.